The Universe wants to play (6)

The story so far:

Part 5

Part 4

Part 3

Part 2

Part 1

Meanwhile, after the romantic interlude…

Sanders doesn’t live under his name but with it and the constant questions of why, well…why Greg? You can’t get more boring than that or add in your own least favourite name. Sanders lives up 39 steep steps, always wheezing, reaching the top, meaning to stop smoking four or five times everyday. Being a security guard doesn’t help, time standing round in the dark, liking the glowing red after a puff and the smoke being dragged down his throat.  

Today, when the summit is reached he sits in his chair in front of the computer and reads the ODT for light relief and all the stories that don’t matter, like motorists being harassed by dwarves in security uniforms.

What’s that about? Groups of unemployed dwarves left destitute after the end of the Hobbit’s filming wreaking revenge on Peter Jackson’s former countrymen? Or an underground race of dwarves predating the Maori’s arrival and finally coming out to reclaim their land? Or some fetishistic dwarves deciding to show everyone that little people can dress up in uniforms as well; at least they haven’t started sodomising anyone yet.

Sanders emailed the link to Hawthorn with the message, ‘you’ll like this and they had their own stepladder’.

What if the story was real though? Security dwarves sweeping the south looking for, well… something. Sanders had a well developed sense of paranoia, nurtured by experience and a lifetime of mistrust of authority. A list of the culprits is available on request but it includes the Catholic church, schools and all previous and current employers. But even so, it seemed unlikely.  Apart from anything else, such as why bother, people notice things like that and complain. The only answer was it had to be some sort of stunt to advertise something.